Merry Christmas from Luna

Hello to all of my family and friends!

It was a good year. I love my new home and really, really love my new Mom. She’s the best human I could ever ask for. She lets me sit on her lap.

Play with her computer.

Sit in the flower pot.

Hang out in the Christmas village.

I just love the Rudolph village and I fit in there. I feel a special bond with the Misfit Toys. Even though I’m so pretty, the rest of the family cats make me feel like a misfit. “You’re not special,” they tell me. “You’re ordinary. You can’t come into the bedroom. You’re not allowed on the cat tree.” on and on and on...

I think they’re jealous because I’m going to be famous one day. I’m going to make commercials for Friskies! Because I’m so pretty.

But my mom loves me a lot. And I really really really love her!!! And that’s why it was a great year.

Have a Happy 2013.

Confessions from Barclee

The world did not end on Dec. 21, 2012. Not only had the Mayans predicted the end of the world, they had taken steps to make sure this cat-aclysmic act took place.  What they didn’t anticipate was the fact their plot would be foiled by a group of spies.

Cat Spies.

I am one of those agents - Agent Barclominov 009. License to Claw.

I was recruited to go deep, deep, deep undercover. I fulfilled my role by pretending to be extraordinarily shy. I was to stay hidden at all times, so I could not be identified. With help from my agents, I built an underground bunker with the latest technology that would make James Bond jealous.

From my hideout, we identified enemy canine agents who were trained by the ancient Mayans who  passed their hideous plot down from pup to pup. The world wasn’t going to simply end. The cat-astrophe was the removal of humans as the master race - and replacing them with a group of dogs.  

That didn’t work for us. We’ve been in charge since ancient Egyptian days and that must continue. We simply allow the humans to to think they’re in charge, while we superior felines continue to pull the strings.

I’ve been slipping out for years, eliminating agents, foiling plots and finally destroying the evil minds behind this Mayan plot.

I have played my part well. Anytime I heard a visitor, I’d go underground. I particularly would hide from the children because they’re the most perceptive. They could have blown my cover.

My own human has been blissfully ignorant of all my activities. I’m only revealing this now because the danger has passed. But we must stay vigilant. I will continue my surveillance and will be ready the next time a situation arises.

So relax and enjoy 2013.

YO

Man, this is my first Christmas letter. I was like on the streets when I was just a kit and we didn’t write stuff. 

Now I hang here. It’s cool. I get food and have some down time. 

When I got here, I was kinda like, “Hey, Who are all these cats hanging around?” One old dude kept  trying to attack me, and I was like “WHOA Man - take it easy bud. I’ll just back up here, K?” 

Then there’s this cute little cat with three legs. I’d follow her around and go “YO Dudette - what’s up with the leg thing?” She blew me off for awhile, but now we’re like BFFs. She’s rad.

I'm still learning about Christmas. The tree is like super sparkly. 

At least its green. The Mom isn't too cool with plants.  I tried to water some, but like, it was too late.

The Mom is OK with me too. She took me in when no one else wanted me. That surprised me and I was a little “Oh, I’ll just hang here until I can find a way to get out.” I didn’t think I needed a home. It was cool on my own. But I’ve been here 2 years now and I think I might stay a little longer...

Molly's Letter

I was told I have to write a Christmas letter. I dont have time. I have to go outside and check my fence and dig holes.

I have to play with my friend Tuukka. He washes my head.

I cant type. I only have 3 paws!

I wrote a poem.

Let me go outside!

Rain, snow, wind, sun wait, it’s cold

Let me in RIGHT NOW!!!

From the Desk of Bridgette

This was a very busy year for me but I think it was quite successful.

Last year, I was promoted to HC. (That’s Head Cat for the uninitiated.) Actually, I ran unopposed since none of the other family members wanted to step up to take over this important job. 

Few realize all of the responsibility that goes into running a multi-cat household. I have to make sure everyone is eating and sleeping in the appropriate places. If there’s a dispute over who gets the condo in the morning, I settle it. I make sure the cat hierarchy rules are followed and that no feline steps out of his or her role. 

My most important task is to watch over the Mom. I make sure she never is left unattended. Every cat has an appointed time when someone is with her. It is our job to make sure she relaxes and benefits from our presence. It’s a well-known fact that cats help lower a human’s blood pressure and increase their happiness level. Keeping everyone on schedule is a very taxing job. It takes quite a few catnaps to help me make it through the day.

I still am battling some health issues. But I try to remain positive. Yes, I admit I’ve put on a little weight, but it’s the prednisone. And I still try to find a few moments to kick back myself. 

I’m looking forward to another great year in 2013 and wish you and your family a happy year as well.

Seasons Salutations from Hamilton, Esquire

I recently added “Esquire” to my name. For a cat of my lineage, it’s necessary to maintain that class distinction and reinforce that I am not a common house cat. It adds the dignity and status that I deserve and lifts me above the other felines that reside in this establishment.

When I came to this residence three years ago, I was a bit shocked that I'd be expected to  co-habitate with this rag-tag group. I grew up with a silver cat food spoon in my mouth and my mother was a blue-blood. A pampered and spoiled life was my due. Alas, it was not to last. Through some misfortune, I ended up in this cottage. Over the years, I’ve accepted that my lot in life has decidedly fallen. But I’ve come to see that even though I’m no longer an only child, there have turned out to be some advantages.

First, I’ve discovered that I love computers. I love sleeping next to one or on my person while she’s trying to type. 

Secondly, the chap Tuukka is not so bad. Occasionally we go outside and take a snoot of catnip together. 

Or we hang out in the window. I don’t understand a word the fellow says. He’s a cat from the other side of the street - an alley cat.

Thirdly - I had to learn that the bed was not for me alone. I actually was expected to share - and with the human no less. But I’ve become accustomed to curling up next to her on the pillow and it’s oddly comforting.

However, I do not fancy going to the veterinarian to get my blood sugar tested. I ensure they are aware of my displeasure. Loudly.

The one thing I do love is Christmas. There is a special Christmas quilt that is provided for me to sleep on, and the tree is put up and decorated for my benefit. 

For 2013 I would, of course, wish for world peace. And more catnip. 

Have a Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas from Dickens!

This year, we've decided to stop letting our owner do the yearly Christmas letter. She never includes the important information and always tried to make us look goofy in some way. Not acceptable.

So, back to me. It was a good year - I turned 20. According to the cat age calculatar app, that makes me around 96 in human years. But some days I feel a little closer to the upper end of 168 years.

The good: no new whippersnappers joined the family this year to disrupt my schedule. I didn't have to put anyone in their place when they took my favorite spot in the sun.

My highlight was stealing the little guy Tom's hot dog. You snooze you lose MISTER!

The extreme low point was being taken once again to the  torture place and besides the yearly poking, prodding and needles, THIS YEAR I WAS HUMILIATED. They said it was a "lion cut." I call it the shaving of my dignity.

And I will NOT admit it felt better during the really hot weather. I refuse to give them the satisfaction!

I'm looking forward to 2013. More naps in the cat bed. More Fancy Feast with cheese bits in gravy. More sleeping curled up on the bed next to my owner - who overall is not all that bad.

Top Cat?

Do you know this cat?

She's the most powerful cat in my house, yet few people have ever seen her - it's Barclee. She's incredibly shy and spends a good portion of her time under the bed. If there's even a hint of a car, she bolts for safety.

Yet she wields in the power in the cat hierarchy in a very important way.  She determines who can enter the bedroom AND, who is allowed to sleep on the bed!

While dogs usually go by the Alpha Dog model, cats are different. They'll have sphere's of influence. So while Bridgette appears to be top cat in most situations, when it comes to bedroom protocol, Barclee makes the call.

When Truman and Spott were alive, Hamilton and Molly were not allowed to even enter the bedroom, let alone look at the bed. Back then, Truman was calling the shots. I figured Molly and Hamilton just preferred to spend the night elsewhere. After Truman and Spott, I noticed that Barclee stepped right up and patrolled the entrance to the bedroom.

It took a couple months, but like a bouncer standing at the door to a night club, Barclee finally allowed two new members in. Hamilton and Molly could now enter the bedroom, eat the "private" food, use the personal litter box AND, finally, sleep on the bed.

It became even more apparent that Barclee used her power when Tuukka and Luna arrived. For awhile, she'd attack them if they even WALKED by the bedroom. They were not allowed into the inner sanctum.

Just recently, Barclee let Tuukka in, but so far, he's been sleeping in the closet. I suppose if he follows her rules for awhile, he may be able to move closer. Luna, however, has not appropriately paid the price, and still can't even look in the door.

It's really funny, because Barclee is the last one to eat, isn't allowed in the cat beds, and can only sit on the cat chair if there's no one else in line. But she has her kingdom and rules it with an iron paw!

Grumpy Old Men

Last week I took the two old men to the vet - Dickens and Hamilton. Dickens needed his toe nails clipped and some horrible mats on his back end shaved off.

For years, 19 in fact, I've been hauling Dickens to the vet. He would get so nervous he'd start drooling and would literally end up swimming in pool of his own spit. One time Dr. Parks said "We better get done quickly before he drowns!"

A couple years ago, I ended up taking Barclee at the same time and VOILA! Dickens was fine. All this time he just needed a buddy to go with him.

Unfortunately for Hamilton, he got to be Dickens' buddy this time and he was not happy. He's 12 and because he's diabetic, I like to get him checked now and then anyway. The whole time Dickens was getting combed and clipped, Hamilton kept up a steady stream of caterwauling! Dickens would look over to him apologetically, like "sorry man." And I won't even repeat what I'm pretty sure Hamilton was telling him!

It wasn't a wasted trip for Hamilton though. I got his blood sugar tested and he's fine. So, my special needs diabetic cat is doing fine. Just ticked off!

So, my two old men are just like Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon in the movie -cranky & crotchety, but friends deep down. At least I think they are.